Tiba-tiba, Bimo bertanya kepadaku ...."Mummy what does R and H make?" rupanya dia membaca R dan H di pintu itu. "hmmm it is read RH, I don't know what it stands for"
Tiba tiba juga Galuh berdiri dan berlari kecil ke arah pintu, seraya menutup 'uni' pada 'unisex' dia bilang "Mummy look if I cover this, it is read 'sex'."
Reaksi batinku saat itu...."kaget! and then...hmmm okay let's see what she's gonna say next"....aku berkata padanya "yes you are right it is read sex"...
Galuh langsung melanjutkan..."mummy my teachers said it is a bad word, we are not allowed to say it!"
hmmmmm mbatin lagi....ini kesempatan baik dan tepat untuk sex education...
lalu aku bilang padanya "really? your teacher said that?" Galuh mengangguk dan bilang "yes mum, my teacher said that and my friends too"
lalu Bimo menimpali...."yes mum it is a bad word....no....no...we are not allowed to say it at school"
Lalu aku jelaskan..."well actually, sex is not a bad word. For example if someone asked you what is your sex? you will answer "I am a girl" or "a boy". If you have a pet, someone ask you what is the sex of your pet...you will answer 'it's a female or male'. So sex is telling about girl or boy, female or male"
Aku: "Did you ask your teacher why is it a bad word"
Galuh: "No, we are not allowed"
Aku: "Next time maybe it is good to ask your teacher why it is a bad word, so we know the reason."
Lalu Galuh berkomentar...."I see mummy"
Tiba tiba Bimo bicara "Mummy, H*y** said sex is giving love..."
Aku: "Oh so...when I love you, it is sex?"
Bimo: "No mummy, not that kind of love, it is different.."
Aku: "ooooh...how is it different? can you explain it to me because I don't really understand"
Bimo: "Sex is when you get married and kiss each other"
Aku: "and then...."
Bimo: "I don't know what next mummy"
Lalu aku cium kening Bimo..."so is this sex?"
Bimo: "I don't think so mum..."
Aku: "but I love you and kiss you"
Bimo: "well kinda mum" dengan muka bingung
Galuh: "Mummy, someone wrote "killing me with your love" at school and we told our teacher,"....."sex can kill, Mummy"
Aku: "How?"
Bimo: "yes mummy...it can kill maybe when someone giving sex"
Aku: " I still don't get it..."
Galuh: "it's like this mum..., when you have a pet and you love the pet so much, you give the pet what ever it likes, you give the pet people's food and the pet get diabetes, it is not healthy and it die. So love can kill" "When you love someone too much it can kill"
Bimo: "yes mummy it is like that...."
Aku: "I see..."....well let me tell you something, the word sex is not a bad word but sometime adult think differently and think that is a bad word to say for a kid. But it is actually simple...like in that door it says unisex....it means it can be use by any sex, boy or girl (yang ini dalam hati: well, belum saatnya aku menjelaskan selain boy and girl), if it says female or ladies or girls then it is only for female sex. If it says male or men or boys it is only for male sex"
Galuh: "Okay mum, I get it but I don't wanna say it...it is not allowed"
Aku: "that is okay if you don't wanna say it but remember you can talk about anything with me, including the things that your teacher said that is bad. We can talk about that okay!"
Galuh dan Bimo ngangguk ngangguk...trus tiba tiba...ngajak ke Target liat mainan katanya....hehe
This is one of the days that sex education can be anytime anywhere.
Pertanyaan ataupun pernyataan tentang sex bias muncul dari anak anak kapan saja, saat itulah menurut saya adalah saat yang tepat untuk memberikan pendidikan seks pada anak anak, sedikit sedikit sesuai pertanyaan dan pernyataan mereka.
Mungkin berbeda dengan orang tua lain, saya mencoba membuat pembicaraan tentang seks sebagai pembicaraan biasa yang tidak tabu dan haram dibicarakan. Anggapan pembicaraan seks sebagai tabu justru akan membuat anak anak sulit mendapatkan informasi yang benar. Sekarang sih nggak apa-apa. Tapi nanti?
Saat keingintahuan mereka akan seksualitas jadi sangat tinggi...biasanya di masa remaja, akan beranikah mereka bertanya pada kita kalau kita sudah bilang "you are not allowed to say that!"
Saya juga masih belajar jadi orang tua sih, ya anak anak saya baru usia 8 dan 6 tahun di bulan Oktober ini. Tapi saya ingin menjadi sumber informasi utama bagi mereka terutama urusan seksualitas yang di luar sana informasinya menurut saya nggak karu karuan.
Melbourne, 20 September 2015
Bunda GalBim
